Wednesday, June 11, 2008

When Gossip Becomes Stilettoes

Sometime ago Pandora's box voiced, that women can not do without gossip. I doubt if there is any living soul with their heads on the right shoulders who will ever deny the claim. But calling women gossip harmless is like declaring Roses do not prick. We all know better than that - They have thorns and one has to be very, very careful while plucking or handling them.

There must be few if any who don't appreciate " Sex and the City" and they may have their own reasons for that. But for women it must have been one unanimous decision. The ideal friend to whom you can run to in the middle of the night and she comes to your rescue even if she has to leave the best *** activity of the night. The “Sex and the City” scenario is a dream situation. Where 4 women with absolute myriad temperaments, needs and social standing come together and are San any malice. I will forever find it difficult to palate that in real life with my post college experiences, but then “SAC” is an ideal thought of the writer where, every girl can bake a cake and eat it too!

The movie released 2 weeks ago and I have yet to see it. But before that I finished watching the reality show of the Real Housewives, season2, which featured a group of NY socialites. The situations given were believable, had a lot of drama, competition, jealousy, I-am-better-than-you moments and wanna be desperates. But in the end you have to put your best foot forward, smile at everyone and savour the moment you are thrown in and behind their back grind your teeth and swear under you breath that you have never met such bull heads ever, even if you are literally one of them, when among them. No one is perfect and the sooner we accept it the better.

I think many of us have experienced the wonderful camaraderie during our college and school life, where you have one special friend who is always alert to your needs. Who is there to take the daily walks with you, who will suppress her fear of darkness to accompany you to the loos in the middle of the night, who will fore go the lunch fruit share for you because you have kept a fast, who will wake up early in the morning to give you your medicine because you have a habit to forget, that special friend who reads your thoughts and completes your sentences. To spend every waking hour together study, play and gossip. Situations where none of your inner thoughts can be hidden and you want it exactly that way.

Not many people may have experienced such friendships. If you have not experienced it you will not miss it. And its something that is difficult to replace once its gone. But, marriages take you to different shores and childhood friends become random emails and once in a blue moon phone calls. And the search is again on for that one who will be your therapy mate. Age and some experiences teach you to be cautious as well as suspicious of fair weather entities. And so gossip will never be held as harmless for me.

The lesson I have learnt is that don't make any opinion about anyone until you have spent at least 4 of your consecutive weekends with them.
I guess checking people in groups and as individual is a good idea. I have seen people behave different when they are alone with you and when they are in a group of friends.
Always listen to the tiny voice inside which will guide you in the direction that's best.
Stay away from people who are into too much of negative gossiping about others. Chances are, you will top the list, in your absence.

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